"No it's, it's like any growth you can't be ready for it because it's growth it's going to be new. You're going to have a new life. You are going to be a new person." - Jerry Seinfield
As you get older in most cases you start making some changes.
The people you would normally spend your time with fade, and you realize who was there for you from the beginning and who were there only for themselves.
| You start being able to realize who people are before they even speak. |
Growing up I surrounded myself with people who now seem to be indefinitely lost, people who were staying right where they were and had no plans of changing or bettering themselves. That is perfectly fine not everyone needs or wants change.
I, on the other hand require change, growth and a sense of accomplishment. I don't keep up with zodiac signs much. I read them from time to time, and I don't fill myself into the box of the norm. I am definitely not the norm, I may make a decision but then I change my mind in the middle too. I just want to do what is right in most cases, but I have to take a stand for myself. I never know exactly who or what I want to be, can never grow up because there is no end in sight for me. I am ever changing and that is exactly what I want.
I never want to be stuck or in a place where I don't want to be. Trust me I have thought about packing up life and leaving a few more times than none. I sometimes find myself wanting to be surrounded by people to only then want to be alone. I don't always want or need company because a lot of time my thoughts occupy a lot of space, I don't smile often. Not because I am not happy but because I am so wrapped up in my thoughts that I forget to make that connection to smile.
Life has been a bit of a worry on my mind lately it is probably the reason that my stomach has been in turmoil for about two weeks now. I don't know what I want, I keep wanting to make a change but I fear failure. It has been a worry on my mind lately that I need to grow and figure out who I want to be. I have grown wayyy out of my current job, I find an inconvenience now. It occupies time that I can devote to my creativity. My photography and blog (writing).
I can turn this blog into anything I want and I can do the same with my photography and I think it is time to do just that. I have too many people telling me what to do at my full time job I don't need it where I am the boss.